Notes From Thoughtful Ron
It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it
harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as
they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some
oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive
My name is Ron...... Let me relate how I handled the situation
wife, Julie. When I took "early retirement" last year, it became
Julie to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the
benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working I noticed
was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she
from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always
has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I
at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when
dinner on the table.
I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating
not reasonable. I'm ready for some home cooked grub when I hit that
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now
unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after
what I can by reminding her several times each evening that they
clean themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to
her to get them done before she goes to bed.
I really think my experience as a teacher helps a lot. I consider
people what they ought to do is one of my strong points...
Now that she has gotten older, she does seem to get tired so much
quickly. Our washer and dryer are in the basement. Sometimes she
just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big
of this; as long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening, I'm
to overlook it Not only that, but unless I need something ironed
to the Monday lodge meeting, or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker
Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling, or something like that, I will
to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a
more time to do some of those odds and ends like shampooing the dog,
vacuuming or dusting...
Also, if I had a really good day on the course and it was wet and
my clubs are a mess, so I let her clean them, you know..... get the
the grips and a little light Brillo on the club faces at a casual
My golf bag is heavy so I lift it out of the trunk for her. Women
have weak wrists and can't lift heavy stuff as good as men. But I
tell her I don't like to be awakened during my after-golf nap so,
bother me, she can put them back in the trunk when she's
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example,
say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly
during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so
and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or
three days. That way she won't have to rush so much.
I also remind her that missing lunch now and then wouldn't hurt
(if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest
She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the
not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a
big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a
as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one
and then take her break by my hammock. That way she can talk with
until I fall asleep.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support
not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men
it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than
how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if
use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because
article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile.
are put on this earth to help each other... Signed, Ron
EDITOR'S NOTE: Ron died suddenly Feb. 3. He was found with a
extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II in a very odd place with
of grip showing... His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-woman
accepted her defense that he accidentally sat on it, and she was